One hour diary

My mobile ranged for an alarm. It was 5’0 clock. I was cozy and warm inside the blanket. I snoozed the alarm. It again ranged for the second time after 5 minutes. “Why is it ringing? “ I murmur lazily. After a while, I became conscious and woke up. It was shivering cold outside. It was dark .Wind was steady. I was shaking, although I was on my thermo coat wear.

 I rushed to my room quickly to put warm clothes on. I was still half asleep. Switched on the light outside. The forest went whitish in display. Glimpse of horror movie came in my head resembling with Wrong Turn series. My heart was cold. I approached to take pee. How matchless experience it is to take a leak from Simle staring at Pyutar? Was I supposed to take a pride of it or should I be regretting for showing the uncivilized behavior? Whatever, it is, I was taking mindful moment in the early morning alone. I was warming myself with the joy of being a juvenile.

But deep down, I was seeking for a hope despite of the laziness overloaded inside me. I was looking for an invisible push or kick which would refill my energy back. I was trying to share my misery with the flawless wind. I thought it was receptive but it tricked me. I trusted but it betrayed me. I thought it was   time to say hello but it waved me with goodbye. I gazed at the sky fiercely; l manifested a look to the moon. While it was still giving a light persistently on the dark earth, I gathered optimism.

Why I was looking for Utopia? Perfectionists are rarely seen. How can I build a happy life with an illusion? I can’t start a day with a false hope.

As I reflected back, I was looking for perfect time to be enthusiastic. Sitting idle for a magic to turnaround was my gaffe. I was expecting something which would change my manner of being idle. I was letting my time to flow haphazardly. I was seeking patience but a fire was set. I was trying my best to react in accordance with emotions but thinking was leading. What do I want to learn? Will I be? Would I succeed to get an answer for a quality education? Well, it demands more of Karma rather than an absolute answer.

I went inside the room to make a tea for myself. I desperately wanted to the warm myself with hot liquor. I played Buddhist chants from my laptop. A deep intensified voice from heart with peacefulness in mind, that’s how I describe the singer who sung them. I allowed the music to flow in my veins. Gradually, I could feel the positive vibes inside me.

I locked my thoughts with the room and leaved to start the day with remedial classes for grade 8 students. I was in Class exact on 6’o clock as if the world could have been upside down if I was a minute late. But, I was sent as a change maker, right?